So, I have this question I've been thinking about recently.

Why is it that when a couple gets into a fight that ends with someone being kicked out of the bedroom, it's always the woman taking the bed while the man retires to the couch regardless?

Is it because it's a gentlemanly thing to do even if the woman was at fault? Or because the woman is the one who has the claim to that part of the house (almost like the kitchen)?

This is just a random thought - not particularly out of experience, but merely out of curiosity. Fortunately, that hasn't happened in our household.

Yet.

And, if it does, which is very unlikely but then again you never know, I'd gladly take the couch.

Our Christmas vacation is officially set up. We're spending it with Ian in the UK this year.

Woohoo!

I'm totally excited and mentally/physically preparing myself for it. Christmas is a pigging out season (at least for me, anyway) and knowing my brother's culinary stunts will mess up my resolve for weight-watching, I seriously have to do some prepping for that before I come back like a huge stuffed turkey. I may have to boycott eating altogether because I'm planning on celebrating the holidays in style. You know, pretty dresses + heels + make-up and all that girly stuff - so I'd feel and look like a grown up for once. It's one of the few excuses I have to dress up. I never get to do that that much these days. My life is boring as we speak.

But I digress.

There really isn't much to tell about myself. Unless of course you're interested about my plans on re-vamping my wardrobe. If you look inside my closet, it's a vision of eclectic mix. It's boring, though. Add to that sad and pathetic. Okay, I do have some good stuff, but the majority is pure junk. If the fashion police finally decides to raid my closet, they will definitely chuck everything out and I'll end up snatching my favorites before they notice. I have to do something about that. My thoughts are gearing towards hoodies and colorful cardigans, skinny jeans and sneakers. Maybe get another haircut? Ooh, what about dye? If only I could pull off skinnies. I may have to find me a sharp butcher knife (we don't have one, unfortunately) and slice off a thick part of my thighs because lipo is expensive and this way is a whole lot easier and quicker. Messy but, you know, quite as effective. Haha! Sorry for that gory detail and clearly it was a joke. (Gah, my sense of humor just plummeted. That is if I have one.)

If only I had longer legs though, it wouldn't have mattered.

And, no, before you think it, I'm in no way depressed! I'm practically cracking myself up writing this. I just tend to blabber nonsense a whole lot lately and this is why I thought staying quiet was a good idea. No point subjecting you to mental torture while reading my nonsensical thoughts.

But you're all very sweet and welcoming and probably checking back for updates often so this is the least I could do.

Thank you, my darlings! You make my heart swell. :)

I'm still alive.

I know most of you are worried about me - why I kept to myself for a month without notice, why I haven't answered your e-mails and comments, why I haven't visited your blogs and left comments as I used to. Be rest assured, though, that I am well and happy.

I'm currently nursing a cold though. But, other than that, I am doing great!

The break was something I didn't plan but I'm glad that I took it, nonetheless. It was a rather selfish thing to do - indulging myself, lazying around the house, living on take-outs, deliberately keeping away from social encounters, not keeping in touch with people, etc. - but I sort of needed it. I spent time with myself doing things I like and I felt like I know myself better. I haven't done anything like it until recently and I will be lying when I say that I didn't enjoy it because I enjoyed it immensely - much more than I should.

Ah!

So yeah, I'm back. Sort of. :)

I want to bounce, bounce, bounce around the house. I feel so elated it's making me high. The caffeine-withdrawal effect is taking on a totally different route. I'm suddenly more hyper than usual.

One reason I could think of this sudden change is the bright sunny weather we're having today. It's been dreary, wet and cold for the past weeks which I actually loved, by the way, but the sunshine perked up the energizer bunny in me. And I like it!

I've recently received two surprise packages in the mail. Surprise because I really wasn't expecting them. At all. Maybe these also explain my hyper-bouncing mood as well. Eeeee!

Dyanie sent me a package of crochet and sewing sundries with a handwritten letter. I was expecting a postcard from her, but instead, she sent me more than that. How thoughtful of her!

And, there's the mixed cd from Nicole with a letter sent with hugs and a lollipop (of course, Mike ate it - lol). I absolutely love the songs! I'm actually listening to them right now for the nth time!

Thank you so much for the lovely mail surprise! *bouncing hugs to you both*

Ah, so much catching up to do!

I have been off caffeine for more than a week now, except for yesterday, when I took a few of sips of Coke while we watched Forbidden Kingdom. The effect of this caffeine withdrawal is making me sluggish the whole day. I'm always sleepy and tired, but I am convinced in my resolve to cut it off. So far I haven't craved for it and I wish it stays that way. Though drinking it was all I could think of while watching Hellboy 2 yesterday (yes, we did a sort of movie theater marathon) because I had a hard time fighting off sleep during the first 30 minutes. That was a real torture because I didn't want to miss anything. It took a lot of control to keep my eyes open the whole time. I did enjoy both movies though, especially the fight scenes in FK and the characters in H2. The plots weren't really all that, the stories were pretty straightforward and predictable, but the effects and cinematography were worth the tickets we paid for. It was good to be out like that again, I owed Mike that.

I feel kind of crappy about myself right now because I can't seem to get off my Twilight obsession. I'm re-reading it for the 5th time (gasp!) and it just keeps getting better. How is that even possible? And you know what's bad? My shop going online is pending because of it. My mind is not totally back on track to the real world yet but I am better than last week so that's an improvement. I just need a bit more time to get attuned to the life without Twilight. I need to get my creative groove back. I just wish I read the saga after the shop was launched then I wouldn't have to deal with having to stall it again. One of these days, I will have to WILL myself to set aside any Twilight thoughts. Good luck to me!

Wow, it's been a while, hasn't it? I couldn't get the words out the past days because I didn't want to whine about not feeling well or inspired to write. I feel a little stressed out with all these shop preparations because I'm now dealing with the tricky part of writing the customer service details and I don't like it. Should I do refunds? How much are the shipping costs? I already have a lot in my hands - making all the stuff, writing inventories, finalizing designs and the webshop itself is a lot of work. Tell me, why am I doing this again?

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh! Help me!

My nerves are going haywire because I am nearing the beginning. Sometimes I think about what I got myself into. Am I ready for this? I'm not so good in handling stress like this because I feel like I am carrying all the weight alone and I want everything to be perfect. Every night, I have to reassure myself that everything will be fine and I can do it. Surely enough, I wake up every morning ready to tackle the day's to-dos. I have to push myself to do things. I have to want to do things. I can't wait for inspiration to come all the time. I learned to trigger it even when I feel like I am the most uncreative person. I'm so insecure, I know. I'm dealing with it. I'm not normally like this. It's because of all those donuts I ate.

See, I'm whining again. But this is just my way of saying that I am okay and it's normal. I'm going to get through this. It just feels good to let it out, you know, as I feel a burst coming up soon and it's going to be a big one. I may also just be sympathizing with the weather. It's been raining a lot lately.

Today, we changed the link for my blog to www.xoxogracey.com/blog in preparation for the shop. And, I also set up an account on Dawanda. It's the European version of etsy. There are no products up yet but you can check it here.

I may be feeling all nervy about all of this, but I'm also very excited. I have lots to show you! I haven't made photos yet because of the somber weather we've been having - the lighting is pretty bad so I'm going to wait until this weekend. Can't wait to hear what you think about them!

This week was a drag. I have been feeling sick - there's a virus going around again - and practically didn't have the drive to do much. My eating habit has gone from weird to weirdest, too. And Mike says I don't drink enough and he is worried about my kidneys. So, one evening, he had me drink a pint of water in one go. It's just that when I'm busy and very occupied with what I'm doing, I forget everything else. I forget that I haven't eaten or drank anything substantial the whole day. And the weird thing is, I think I'm gaining more weight. HOW?!

The house is still in chaos and I can't be bothered with it right now. We're making progress working in my craft room though, but I have no idea when we'll finish. Tomorrow we'll buy supplies and work further in the room. We have to remove the old paint, spackle the walls, sand the plinths, doors and doorway and re-paint everything. I really want this done because our living room and hallway now resemble a junkyard. It's not fun.

I also got my first two postcards from Postcrossing this week, at the same time the postcards I sent were received. I'm happy they loved them so that made me happy, too! Now I wish I made a picture of the postcards before I sent them because they were from my collection of Nick Bantock art postcards. When I sent my first 5, I thought I won't be doing it anymore because I'm not really into writing to strangers, but it feels so good to receive things in the mailbox that aren't ad-folders and bills so I requested my next 5 addresses today. I will be making a trip to the post office again on Monday.

On the shop front, I am still in the process of making things and I have new stuff to show soon. I am so excited! This week actually gave me a little scare and thoughts of backing-out haunted me again. See, writing about it actually helped because if I choose to stop now, I will not only disappoint myself but also other people. And I don't like to disappoint people. There are just those days when I don't feel inspired and creative that doubts and insecurities cloud my thoughts. But I'm thankful that every day I wake up with a renewed spirit - ready to accomplish the things I hope for and dream about. I just can't help feeling nervous and scared and unsure about it all but I want to give it a go. I don't want to let the time pass again without trying.

I have also been youtube-ing a lot lately and found some funny and interesting videos like this one. Let me know what you think about it. :)

Happy weekend everyone!